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Posts tagged ‘Paraprosdokian’

Aside

Are You an Early Bird?

The early worm...

Some people just are not “Morning People”.

Myself for one. It’s seems my whole life my body clock isn’t set to rise for the day anytime before 10:00 am. Not that every now and again when for some strange reason I have been up and awake I haven’t enjoyed the beauty of seeing the sunrise and the world waking up. I have. Watching the fog lift seeing the dew on the grass as the sunlight reveals the shadows…. yes early morning has its own beauty, just as watching the sunset or looking up at the nighttime stars. Different yes and each lovely and unique to behold.

The thing is I’m just not much for jumping up at the crack of dawn and certainly hardly ever feel like I’m rested and want to wake up. I’d rather roll over and stay tucked under my blankets all safe, warm and contented to just stretch and drift back off to dreamland.

Other people are  the opposite, such as my dad for example, he is up early every morning, bright-eyed and ready to start his day. He woke me up one Saturday morning years ago at 9:00am, telling me “get up sleepy head it’s 9 am like that’s some kind of magic number for being up and out of bed??

Then he started doing a silly “happy dance” and “singing” …Oh…it’s good to get up in the morning…it’s fun to get up in the morning…la, la, la… that’s all I remember because he had just made it up. And of course seeing my dad standing in my bedroom doorway hopping from foot to foot with one arm up in the air acting so chipper and funny made me laugh and laughing makes it kind of hard to snuggle back under your covers and go back to sleep  So then he stops and using his regular “daddy” voice he says to me, “come on, get up, it’s 9:00 already and the days half over! Then he turned and walked back down the hallway towards the living room and kitchen.

Needless to say I figured it was about time I got up, one because the daylight had brightened my bedroom and more important dad had said he thought it was time to get my buns out of bed. So I stretched and yawned kicked off the covers and reluctantly crawled out of bed, hair sticking out this way and that, like I had maybe slept standing on my head, stopped by the bathroom to tinkle, cause that’s what I always do first, and then shuffled into the kitchen still in my jammies, to get a cup of coffee. Then I headed to the living room yawning and stretching as I slowly walked over to plop down onto the couch and joined him watching the morning news.

Of course just because I was up didn’t mean I was awake yet. A minor fact which he quickly noticed and commented about probably because of my sleepy eyed I’m still not awake yet look. Which I noticed as he looked over and just shook his head like he always does when me or my sisters have him a bit bewildered.

My dad, has never understood why I should still be looking and feeling so groggy in the morning when he feels the opposite naturally waking up 2 or 3 hours before me and he does it on fewer hours of sleep.

Honestly I feel the same way because I don’t know why or how he can wake up every day at the crack of dawn (usually around 6am) wide-eyed and bushy-tailed practically jumping out of bed all full of energy ready to begin a new day.

Now I know there are all kinds of reasons why some people are “early birds” vs “I love to sleep in” types of people, things like ones health, or their sleep habits…blah, blah, but I’m not pondering this question because I have a wish to turn myself into some alien “morning person” because I’m very happy being a later in the day, “mid-morning, closer to brunch time type person” and I wouldn’t want to shock my dad either by all of a sudden changing into some slap happy, jumping out of bed before the birds are out and become a crazed sunrise watcher.

I’ve come to the conclusion a long time ago that some people are “morning people” and some people are just NOT, and it’s just another of the million-trillon things that make us all unique and different from each other.

Me – I’m naturally not a “morning person” and now I’ve got an answer for my dad the next time the topic of rising early enters our conversation, or in response to all those out there who mention one of the old proverbs like, “early to bed, early to rise”… and the “early bird gets the worm”… Now I can answer back, “Since the early worm gets eaten by the bird…Sleep Late!

He is gonna love it! And I can’t wait to see him shaking his head…LOL.

Love you bunches dad.

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Paraprodokians

English: Sir Winston Churchill.

Paraprosdokian, are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; often humorous in a way that causes the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part. A paraprosdokian is extremely popular among comedians and satirists. Some paraprosdokians not only change the meaning of an early phrase, but they also play on the double meaning of a particular word.

This list of paraprodokians I received via a forwarded email and the email stated that Winston Churchill loved them. I don’t know if he actually did or not, but I sure have gotten “a kick in the funny bone” from reading them and I hope you do also.

I have turned each of the sentences into an image quote” using “Paint” clip art and various fonts from 1001 Free Fonts.com and dafont.com.

Please see the gallery below.

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